[In Aheaditorials] [May 20, 2009]
Life Was Great Until Rove Pushed Me Out
In an exclusive column for Horriblescope, Satan talks about his outster from Hell, Karl Rove and how it all went down.
God Fires Tom Cruise[Mar. 22, 2009] It looks like Tom Cruise's development deal with God is finished, meaning the former superstar now will be lucky to get a sit-com role on Fox. [In Gossip]
Bin Laden Salutes Bush, Lauds End Of Air Travel[Oct. 13, 2007] Osama Bin Laden celebrates the end of U.S. commerical air travel — and debuts an emo video featuring George W. Bush. [In Uh-oh]
Abstinence Leads To More Sex, Study Finds[Sep. 4, 2007] Researchers find that abstinance leads to more and more bizzare sex acts — causing a rift between some religious leaders, those still supporting abstinance and those now opposed. [In Futurestuff]
Bush: Sorry About Armageddon 'Thing'[Jan. 16, 2007] President Bush apologized for touching off a series of events leading to world-wide nuclear devastation and then put forth a bold plan to repopulate the Earth. [In Uh-oh]
Cell-Phone, Minivan Driving Mom Taken Out By Missles, Bush Says 'Mission Accomplished!'[Jan. 7, 2007] The nation's final cell-phone using, mini-van driving soccer mom was executed, ending a four-month drive to wipe them out, led by President Bush. [In Futurestuff]
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